There’s an exclusive club that—while I will probably never belong to it—joining it has become my obsession the last few years. That club is the small group of guys/gals who have at one time made a living playing the banjo, thereby rightfully claiming experience. Not that I want to live paycheck to paycheck mind you; I simply long for the pride of saying I am or was a “professional banjoist!” More than the pride, I want the bragging rights and the respect that goes along with the title (the sense of awe and respect that I myself have always felt for that group).
I want to fit in, and to get the level of respect that I believe my playing deserves, whether I do it for a living or not. I have always been and probably will always be a banjo club guy though. That’s okay; I would never trade that great distinction for any other! I guess what I want is to be in a banjo club and be seen as a top player. Can the two coexist?
Ironically, the few times that I have had a full-time (but short-term) gig have left me not wanting that life style—too much work and ambition for too little pay. I was a Military musician for 20 years, which certainly counts as “making a living”; the banjo was only a small part of that deal though, not enough to affect true progress on the instrument (and too busy to allow sufficient practice time on the side—along with raising a family). The good thing of course is that it was a secure, good-paying job which entailed traveling the world, and has left me with a great retirement package.
Now that I have the time, I find I have little desire to knock on doors begging for a gig; my true obsession is to be a great banjoist, not to sell myself for money. I would jump at a gig that came looking for me, but not one that would require me to move from my quiet retirement home and lifestyle in rural Arizona. Anyone in New Orleans, a Trad band, or on a riverboat need an occasional sub who has no desire to take your job? I’m your guy!
I’m saying this because I feel I owe my readers an apology. I have tried to use my alter-ego—The Banjo Snob—as a path to respect in lieu of actual experience; this of course means that I have been using you for that purpose as well. I have tried to pass myself off as a “subject matter expert,” all the while hoping that Toto doesn’t pull the curtains back to expose me as a sham with few legit “professional” credentials. I apologize for this.
Of course, saying this can be seen as begging for affirmation, which I seem to crave. It must be said though, in order for me to clear the air and move forward. That’s why I write; it’s the best way I have found to learn about myself and organize my thoughts. Thank you for listening!